The Loud Introduction

To all those children who wish to underestimate or mock my new, peculiar approach to change, I will tell you, there is no need to invoke the mindset of awkwardness or mockery towards my unorthodox testimony, for awkwardness only lies in your misunderstanding, misconceptions, misinterpretations, misconduct, ignorance, and arrogance. Keeping my ideas and thoughts clandestine, I will only introduce partially, the new wave of thought that will cause a complete 180 degree character change. It will come along with physical, metaphysical, mental, and emotional change, already all this is happening - I can no longer withhold or withstand my subtle, quiet, observant self anymore. There is no forecasting the outcome, but whatever it is, this revolution was necessary. It also involves an amalgamation of philosophical and psychological steps.

Here is the truth, in simple English: If a person tells another person his emotions, his feelings, his true character, the other person would indirectly have control and some sort of authority and power towards him - the hardest and most valued attribute one could give, is trust. Trust could be used as a tool of control, manipulation, and demolition, or harmony, bliss, chastity, and fidelity. Everyone has something he could not trust someone else with, but I hope the shell of "quiet" is broken, and I hope it is an example to others. This testimony automatically gives the reader power over me, the reader could mock and humiliate and simply think this is all weird, but let me repeat: there is no need to invoke the mindset of awkwardness or mockery towards my unorthodox testimony, for awkwardness only lies in your misunderstanding, misconceptions, misinterpretations, misconduct, ignorance, and arrogance.

WITH THE POWER OF TRUTH,
I, WHILE LIVING,
HAVE CONQUERED THE UNIVERSE.

I am trusting you, the reader, with my truth, a very powerful step, it is to rid myself of all guilt, and to associate my being-for-myself and being-for-others, something that is necessary to continue revolutionizing. The duality of my being-for-myself and my being-for-others permits the same possibilities of inauthenticity as does the duality of facticity and freedom.

From February 28th 2007, I have introduced a whole new revolutionary phase in my life, one that is still on its way. It is a complete internal revolution, I know that this revolution will result in a paradigm shift. The emotional-orientated aspect of human attitudes (such as love, hate, admiration) are always subtle and alluring, but all these attitudes will reduce, on one way or another, to some form of sadism or masochism. This is a very intriguing phrase if you understand it. Masochism is a desire to be a tool for others, to be manipulated, looked at, and humiliated. Sadism is a desire to look at others, to reduce them to tools, to manipulate, and humiliate them. For example, when you are in love, either you would want to be looked at by your lover, or you would want to have control over your lover.

I will not cause revelation, yet. The perpetual "what-if" will always stay in my mind, but by the mighty wave of a revolution, which may last for years or decades, will prove to me my own strength, my own potency, the true power of my character. A complete revolution can and will never take place, but a tendency towards a complete revolution will.

WE EITHER SUFFER AND DISINTEGRATE EMOTIONALLY,
OR BECOME STRONGER THROUGH THE STRUGGLE.

But this is not enough, so far I just presented a utopian image, but.. the mind and the (metaphoric) heart are two separate entities. There is one thing I cannot conquer, I will not say it now. It has taken over 80% of my mind, I cannot spend an hour without thinking about it. It has become such a huge weakness for me, that should be left unspoken of, I can not be left vulnerable yet. This is my only weakness, what/who has triggered the complete change in character is the weakness itself. There is no planning or forecasting an outcome in a revolution, but this unprecedented emotion that I've kept dormant all my life has awoke, amplifying the importance of emotional stability. The outcome however, will be extreme; either I will have complete emotional stability, or complete emotional instability. This is the chance I will have to take.